To-Do List For the Day:
1. Pour liquid dish soap on the carpet.
2. Scrape, crumble and smear Dad's new deodorant into the carpet.
3. Repeatedly point at my nipples and say "bippo."
4. Find Mom's secret stash of cookies and help myself.
5. Unroll approximately 10 yards of Christmas wrapping paper onto the kitchen floor.
6. Ride in a giant tractor with my dad.
7. Eat some mud.
Whew! This terrible-two business is exhausting.